The Chameleon: Reconciling the Ego and the Soul

Have you worked with anyone who is two-faced? By that I mean pretends to agree with your point of view but yet, behind your back, sides with the opposing point of view?

Have you worked with anyone who seems to be so rational, so clinical, and devoid of having any empathy when interacting or making decisions that involve or impact people?

Have you worked with anyone, who is so paranoid, always covering his or her tracks, and is devastated when he or she makes a mistake and is found out?

Have you ever worked with anyone who lashes out when he or she loses an argument or feels he or she has lost face to his or her superiors?

Have you ever worked with someone who rarely admits he or she is wrong? And when that person does admit the mistake, he or she always tries to reframe the wrongness in terms of what someone else did wrong?

I once worked with someone who had many of these characteristics. This person was invariably described as a chameleon and puppet. The reason for this description was because this person seemed to be devoid of any internal principles. He would take on the characteristics, behaviors, and attitudes of whom ever he was reporting to?

To many of us who worked with this individual, there seemed to be a split between his ego and his soul. Some said perhaps he had no soul. But, I do not agree. I believe that he does have a soul. I believe that his experiences in this lifetime and perhaps previous lifetimes had led him to a persona where his ego had at best become distant and at worst detached from his soul.

On conversations he had had with others, he seemed to belie a deep sense of insecurity due to lack of any visible hierarchical career success he perceived to have experienced in the past. He saw his change in career path when he joined the organization, as a last chance to turn things round. Since he joined the organization, he was known to be fiercely competitive to the point of paranoia. I also felt that the reason for this might also be the result of traumatic childhood happenstances he might have experienced.

Nonetheless, the Chameleon having this deep sense of insecurity seemed rather odd to me. He had undergone rigorous training in a discipline that though albeit unconventional in the medical field, is regarded around the world as a field of serious study. The Chameleon was very knowledgeable in this field. I thought he could have gone to become a world-class authority in that field, if he had stuck to it a bit longer and marketed himself a bit more. It also seemed interesting to me that someone so rational could have studied such a discipline that draws its influences from a marriage of the ego and the soul. What could have led him into the study of this discipline? I do not know.

Anyway back to the story. The Chameleon started off in the organization in a new career path as a professional, and after a few years, an organizational restructure occurred and he became a manager. Unfortunately, when he was promoted, he had to report to a tyrannical manager. The Chameleon quickly took on the characteristics of this tyrannical manager and became tyrannical himself. He was widely disliked and regarded as a puppet who could not make any decision without seeking approval from his direct boss.

From time to time, I got the feeling that he was troubled and perhaps struggling ethically with the persona he had created. After a few months in his managerial position, he called a number of us who were direct reports to him, and informed us that he was going to change his ways. He told us that he was tired of doing things that did not sit well with him. On that occasion, he told us that he had raised concerns about his role in the department but had been told by the tyrannical manager to just develop a “thick skin and get on with it”.

We were all quite pleased, and morale in the department rose for a few weeks when he had this discussion with us. But things soon changed as the Chameleon returned back to his old self. It seemed he had come to a crossroads and had decided that it was better for him to move in the other direction more outwards towards the ego. His attitude and actions and interactions with others worsened, and became rather vile and nasty. To me, it seemed that he had got to a stage where the ego had become detached from the soul and he had become a split-person of sorts.

Reflections

It was very difficult to know how to deal with such an individual. You never knew when he was being genuine and when he was just being political, playing the game. You never knew the underlying reasons behind him asking you certain questions. In turn, many of his reports quickly discovered that they had to always be cautious in their conversations with him. One of my colleagues even took to taking a secret recorder whenever in meetings with him. He had the habit when pushed to the corner of using casual conversations that had occurred months in the past against you. For some, the only way out was to walk away from the organization.

The Chameleon had some good qualities. He seemed at times to be a good listener, and could accept your position or thinking on a particular issue. However, this only happened with minor issues when he felt that any decision made would not be a threat to his own position.

The Chameleon also seemed to have a concern for the environment and all matters green. Sometimes, I just thought if he could just translate some of that Green concern into his workplace persona it would make all the difference. But this quality seems to be one of the pathologies to some of those who espouse Green concerns. They seem to care more for the trees and plants and the environment than their fellow human beings. They seem to suffer from a kind of split personality where their intellectual green rationales are quarantined in a separate part of their mentality.

The Treatment

“In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness.”

Mahatma Ghandi (1869 -1964)

It is difficult to determine what would effectively help the Chameleon to reintegrate his ego with his soul. And for this to happen in such a way that the ego takes its rightful place serving the dictates of the soul in the every day life of Mother Earth. Pointing his failings out to him would perhaps only result in him rationalizing in a way that supports the dictates of his ego.

For such people only come to realize the dysfunctionality of their being when they experience a major setback, or perhaps undergo a religious or spiritual conversion.

Hopefully, the Chameleon would realize how far down the wrong path he has gone and take steps to make the necessary amends.

In general, reconciling the ego and soul involves taking five actions.

First, and most critically, you must become aware of the split or distance that has come between your ego and your soul. However, by default, once you recognize or start to become aware, it is no longer a split but just gaps in the connection between your ego and soul that need to be closed.

The second action would be to pray or meditate for an extended period of time and ask God for forgiveness both for yourself and for all the people you have hurt, either advertently or inadvertently.

The third action is to constantly watch your actions and your motives throughout the day in your interactions with family, friends, and with colleagues and clients in the workplace.

The fourth action is to walk away from situations or places or people where you feel your values are being compromised. This may mean getting a new job, ceasing to work with a particular client, or cutting out certain people you hang out with who have those qualities.

The fifth action is to make amends by engaging in some form of community service. This could entail volunteering in a homeless shelter, being a mentor to underprivileged students, etc. This last action will help you reinforce the integration of your ego and your soul, and reconnect you to the Universal Spirit from whence we all came.